What to Do if Your Autistic Child Bites People

Assistance: How Do I Stop My Son With Autism From Bitter When He's Angry?

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Dear Rob,

My son used to bang his head but he has stopped. For the by ii months, he has been pushing and biting children in the classroom for no reason. At home, he is trying to seize with teeth us when he gets aroused well-nigh non getting what he wants. Please tell me why he is behaving like this with children for no item reason.— Vinss

HELP: How Do I Stop My Son With Autism From Biting When He's Angry? https://www.autismparentingmagazine.com/autism-son-biting-when-angry/

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Vinss,
In nearly cases when parents are really concerned almost the behavior of their child—whether it's biting or sometimes stimming (movements back and forth that can go on for hours)—they'll often become a strictly behavioral answer from a teacher or a therapist. This often takes the course of the following advice to parents: you have to use positive reinforcement for desired normal behavior. Or, if there's a behavior that the parents don't similar, use an aversive stimulus, some kind of penalty, that volition discourage the child from doing the beliefs.

These are overly unproblematic misguided behavioral responses. I don't do that.

What I practice is address the underlying issue. Your son used to bang his head, that has stopped, and now he'south biting people in the classroom and at home.

Yous say he'south behaving similar that "for no detail reason." There'southward nobody provoking the biting. He'southward just biting on his own. The other child didn't do annihilation to him. Why is he biting this person? It seems like a consummate mystery.

But at that place is a reason. Perhaps, the reason is that a preschool child, who is probably about three and a half or four years old, has no other way to communicate with others.

When children are 2, two and a half years old, they're unremarkably able to express their needs and can understand and know their feelings. And your child, who is iii and a half, four years quondam, is frustrated, maybe terribly frustrated almost his inability to notice a better way to communicate. Upwards until this point, nobody's been able to understand why.

At that place'southward no apparent reason because people are not looking for the reason.

About likely he is bitter because he has no language skills and therefore has no other style of expressing himself and agreement others. I'd beginning past asking the parents, what does he sympathise? What clearly doesn't he empathise? How does he express himself when he wants something? How can we create a better connection between what he wants and how he expresses it? Most parents would say that he understands quite a bit.

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Many children on the spectrum actually have no connectedness to language. It's remarkable, and nosotros don't know how to explain it. There's absolutely no connection betwixt what they're feeling and thinking and linguistic communication. These children don't however realize that language is a way of making their lives easier, a style of communicating internal feelings and thoughts to the exterior world. This might be the case hither. There may not exist a language connectedness: he has to exist taught. That may exist the solution. He has to be taught that connection.

If you're a parent looking for an answer, I can tell yous what I do with some kids. Nosotros are now talking about a child who doesn't connect to language and has to learn how to make that connection. One time he makes that connection, he changes nigh immediately. For the kid, Information technology's an amazing revelation. Like, Wow!, this language thing is corking! This language matter really works! That's where I would start. Teaching your child language is an effective mode to get him to cease negative behaviors like bitter.

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I don't hateful holding up a moving-picture show of a house and saying the word 'house.' I've seen ABA therapists holding up the letter T, and the kid has to say "tuh" 8 out of 10 times; this is the way he is expected to learn to speak. Just that's not what I'm talking about. I'thousand talking near learning linguistic communication in the same mode that we learned language, in real situations, with a real context.

Let me give you an instance of a ten-year-onetime male child who had absolutely no language. He was putting pegs in guild. I took one of the pieces abroad, and he began looking for information technology.

This was actually one of the very few times that he acted in a normal manner. He was actually looking for something. He takes constructive activity; he has a purpose, he has an intention. This is what linguists would call an 'affect'—there's an emotion, a feeling behind what he's doing. He's purposefully looking. He wants to find the missing block! I wanted to insert an advisable give-and-take in his heed. I wanted him to be able to limited what he was doing using linguistic communication. What word did I use for him to connect, to tie down and build a span to linguistic communication?

The child was looking for something. I said, "Where?" I said, "Well, where is information technology?" Where could information technology go?" Where exercise yous think it is?" I'thousand trying to connect the word 'where?' with what he's feeling and doing: "Where is the block?"

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Finally, he said "Wh?" That was the quantum. At that moment he realized that linguistic communication could help him in a very key way. This is an example of how to get the child to connect to language. You demand a state of affairs where he is experiencing intention. His mindset and his emotions are all connected.

I wanted him to connect intention with language. He finds out very quickly how language could make his life a lot easier. No need to have to take a tantrum or yell or bite or drag his female parent over to the refrigerator. He can use linguistic communication in a much more efficient way to make his life a lot amend and a lot easier. Rob Bernstein (autismspeech).

Rob Bernstein, an educational therapist specializing in autism spectrum disorders, gives you hands-on suggestions for handling your child's behavioral issues. Rob uses a cognitive approach to sympathise what'southward underlying the behaviors so that the issues can be resolved. He has over iii decades of experience working with individuals with problematic behaviors including tantrums, repetitive behaviors, self-subversive behaviors, hitting, cursing, miscommunication and not-communication, schoolhouse problems, and difficulties relating to others. Rob is likewise the parent of an adult son who is on the autism spectrum.
Come across his latest video about placement at world wide web.autismspeech.com/single-post/2017/05/15/Finding-the-right-placement-for-your-child . Expect for Rob'due south new book, Uniquely Normal, written to help parents make a deviation with their children on the autism spectrum.

Email: [email protected]
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Twitter: @ autismspeech
If you accept a question for Rob, please email [e-mail protected] .

This commodity was featured in Issue 86 – Working Toward a Healthy Life with ASD

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